Friday, May 08, 2009

liveblogging the new eminem album

"3 am" - lame, unimaginative concept, bad choice for an opener. or a song.

"my mom" is one of the best beats of the year. "3 am" really had me worried.

so's "insane" actually. this keeps up and we have easily the best production of his career, perfectly timed if his lyrics are gonna suck now.

ha, "bagpipes from baghdad" sounds like bagpipes from baghdad. these instrumental hooks alone.

annnnnnnnnnnnnd autotune.

least guests on an eminem album since his debut

maybe he had d12 shot and killed

maybe they did it on their own

have i mentioned how much i like the cover on this? eminem album covers usually blow. curtains and stages and shit we get it already

hey he's telling us what his name is again

new character! "tonya." when i heard a female voice in the rain i got really excited at first because i thought he was gonna find the unlikely new angle for the same thing over again by rapping as kim

these new voices are problematic.
and does it count as maturity when he's killing unspecified nobodies minus the absurdist-comedist angle?

oh ha. "we made you" becomes the third eminem first single to improve in album context. loving the jingle bells and pianos and stuff. still haven't laughed since "insane."

one-ups bitch killer ice cube on "medicine ball": "homosexual dissector"

i like the "medicine ball" hook a lot. and the tastefully simple me-against-world i-run-rap braggadocio suits him. maybe he'll become a normal rapper now if he'll lose the stupid "ass like that" accent. why isn't this the opener?

good "paul" skit but i'm sad he didn't mention a gun

took a break to get chinese, accidentally hummed "we made you" the whole way. good sign.

"stay wide awake": someone listened to the red weezer's impression of him!

"old time's sake" is the most alive dre's sounded since...when has dre never not sounded dull? again, nice beat. eminem got fat learning photoshop and music theory for five years. i'm okay with this. more hooks on here should be like "medicine ball" and "we made you" though. nice growl though. i think his voice is returning to normal.

rhymed "dalai lama" and "jeffrey dahma." this serial killer thing might not be his worst idea if he can turn it into a DOOM-style supervillain persona. he'll probably get bored first but good.

weird thing that the first year in years that rap production sounds as expensive as people make it out is in the depths of the recession. maybe they're just being arrogant assholes. rappers.

these skits are mercifully quick, not the album's only advantage over the eminem show.

betting the reviews of this will quote "deja vu"'s "feel like i've been down this road before" in extrapolating their points. so have they.

prediction: "beautiful"'s gonna be huge and herald green day-sized dullness as he takes the cue all the way over the demographic hump to the elder statesman bank

oh hey, i didn't remember "crack a bottle" being this good -- whoops then he came in and ruined the nice little beat with this wordy impossible chorus that no one cares about. still, digging his new affection for bourgie-jazz plinking.

aw steve berman's back. this is overscripted. nice trailer for relapse 2 though.

awww "sometimes people ask me..." with the dramatic music is back! "underground," this is cool! some fitty (not fiddy) beat in a time signature i'm having trouble piecing with a cool choir doing his michael jackson dangerous work. full title is "underground/ken kaniff." i'm excited.

this is easily his sharpest rhyming on the album. a "fantasy" with an "amputee" in each track would've helped the dahmer shtick go down smoother though.

ok i laughed at the kaniff "we made you" callback: "this went over real big in gay.a."

our slumming genius is still entertaining on his worst album, if you care to be entertained. on to green day.


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